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Information Release: Department of Transport issues new Warning Scheme Thursday, 01/06/2006 by nik

Anyone in England will appreciate this humourous 'information release'. It seems that with World Cup fever taking hold again, the country is plagued by daft flags attached to cars. For those of us with a bit more self-respect, we can't help but know what it says about the IQ of the owners...

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Information Release:

Due to the nature of the quality of driving in England the Department of Transport has now devised a new scheme in order to identify poor drivers and give good drivers the opportunity to recognise them whilst driving.

For this reason as from the middle of May 2006 those drivers who are found to be driving badly which includes:

- overtaking in dangerous places:
- hovering within one inch off the car in front:
- stopping sharply:

- Parking like a twit (especially if a blue badge is displayed):
- speeding in residential areas:
- pulling out or turning in without any indication:
- turning across oncoming traffic:
- shouting abuse at school crossing wardens:
- performing U turns inappropriately in busy high streets:

- Unnecessary dawdling (ie doing 50mph or less in a 60mph limit):

- not using mirrors before manoeuvring:
- ignoring round-about laws of precedence:

- Inability to exercise common sense:
- under taking on motorways: and
- taking up more than one lane in multi lane roads.

These drivers will be issued with flags, white with a red cross, signifying their inability to drive properly. These flags must be clipped to a door
of the car and be visible to all other drivers and pedestrians.

Those drivers who have shown particularly poor driving skills will have to
display a flag on each side of the car to indicate their greater lack of skill and general lower intelligence mindset to the general public.

Those who are particularly stupid will also have to display a sign on the
car roof with the word "TAXI" emblazened across it!!!!!!

Please circulate this to as many other motorists as you can so that drivers and pedestrians will be aware of the meaning of these flags.

Department of Transport.

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